A Simple Glossary of Basic Italian Gesticulation: a Summary

NOTE: Those signs and gesticulations of unadulterated vulgarity have been disregarded.  The author offers his apologies to those who may by offended by this censure, truncation, omission, or whatever else you’d like to call it.

NOTE°: Keep in mind that unless specified otherwise, Italians and their limbs are relaxed; there is no reason to strain muscles or hyperextend joints while attempting these gestures. 

ê Disbelief or Sarcasm, as in a raised eyebrow, or “What [in] the __________ are you talking about”:

·         Raise one hand (whichever) to chest level; the palm is halfway between facing you and facing the ceiling; gather all four fingers and thumb together like you’re pinching salt upside-down; casually swing your hand on the hinge of your wrist; for more emphasis, accelerate and/or accent the motion with your whole forearm.

·         Press both hands flat together—fingers also together, thumbs extended—perpendicular to your chest like saintly praying (elbows are relaxed and hanging); the hands move together towards and away from the chest in a casual manner, bending at both the wrist and elbow.

ê Indifference, as in “Who cares,” or “Who gives a flying rat’s left pinky toe”:

·         With fingers together and thumb extended, situate the back of your hand (whichever hand is most comfortable) under your jaw so your fingerbacks are pressed lightly against the flesh under your chin and your wrist is pointed away from your body; in a jerking motion, using your whole forearm, pull your hand out and away from your face a short distance.

o    This is a beautifully diverse gesture.  For variegated emphasis, alter the force with which you draw the hand from under your chin from a lazy drawl or flip (covering a short range of motion) to a jerking, muscle-binding swat (covering a large range of motion); stop the hand in a position of defiance towards the object of your indifference; use both hands. 

o    I once saw an old man so emphatic that he began with the backs of his fingers from both hands down at his ankles and slid them all the way up along his entire body and off his chin in one monstrous, body-bending, elbow-breaking “Who gives a ___________ !?”  (The blank can be filled with any number of various curses, expletives, or euphemisms.)

ê Sly, Slick, or Clever, as in “You sly dog,” or “I am a slick daddy,” or “Clever little bugger, ain’t ya”:

·         Make a relaxed fist, extend your index finger, and poke the skin of your cheek just under the rim of the eye socket (doesn’t matter which side); apply a slight pressure to your cheek and pull down only slightly (half to one inch—it’s a subtle movement) with your index finger; this motion is often accompanied by raised eyebrows or rolling eyes.

ê Lameness, as in “That’s frickin’ lame”:

·         Make a relaxed fist, extend the thumb; in a casual flicking motion, stroke the back of your earlobe with your thumbprint.

ê Hunger, as in “I’m hungry”:

·         Four fingers together (whichever hand), thumb tucked under; use the inside edge of your hand to lightly whack the love handle.

ê Time to Go, as in “It’s time to go”:

·         Same hand position as “I’m hungry” down by the waist; extend the other hand open and palm-down over the “hungry” hand; in a backwards, hinged-sideways-at-the-wrist karate motion so the palm faces the body, lightly karate chop the palm of the extended hand.

o    For reasons of subtlety, you can accomplish the same message without extending the other hand over and simply reverse-karate chop the air.

ê Amazement, as in “That’s crazy,” or “Whoa,” or “Holy potato salad, Batman”:

·         With your hand in the same location relative to your body as “It’s time to go,” totally relax all the fingers and the wrist (this effect varies—you may want to simply loosely splay the fingers and thumb) and act like you’re shaking water off the tips of your fingers or as if you hurt your hand; the motion should keep the palm of the hand facing in toward your body.

ê Born Yesterday, as in “I wasn’t…” or “What were you…” “…born yesterday”:

·         With the same hand position as “hungry” and the same backward karate chop as “It’s time to go” lightly but sarcastically whack the vertical line from the tip of your nose to between your eyebrows with the fingers pointing down.

o    NOTE: this will require an odd angle of the wrist and arm and the use of muscles you’ve likely never before noticed; attempt with caution as you could damage your nose or eyeglasses.

ê Craziness, as in “You’re crazy,” or “He’s wacko,” or “They’re all about two bivalves short of a clambake”:

·         Raise one hand vertically in front and to the side of your head in the second “What [in] the __________ are you talking about” (only half of it—one hand); like a windshield wiper, briskly swipe (movement from the wrist in the “bye-bye” manner) once through ninety degrees so the hand stops with the palm to the ground at about the level of your chin.

o    This gesture is usually accompanied by the Daffy Duck call, “Whoo-hoo!”

êSilly, as in “You’re silly,” usually in a flirtatious manner:

I apologize if this isn’t entirely clear, as it’s a rather difficult gesture to master, let alone describe in words.

·         Position you fingers in the first “What [in] the __________ are you talking about” and adjust and bend your hand and elbow so the clustered fingertips are pointing away from you (your arm and hand will somewhat resemble a goose or a swan if you were making shadows); take the other hand and bring it to meet the bottom of the goose’s neck (just above your elbow); allow the entire hand to bend around the contour of your forearm here; maintaining the same hand position, more the cupped hand two or three inches away from the goose’s neck; **THIS NEXT PART WILL CAUSE YOUR “GOOSE” TO LOOK AS THOUGH IT HAS DEVELOPED A TICK IN THE NECK**  flick the head and neck of the goose forward to smack—and make that noise—into your cupped hand in such a way that the goose’s head flicks up only slightly as the neck flicks forward—imagine what the result would be if a goose and a woodpecker hooked up and had your arm.  THIS GESTURE IS DIFFICULT AND MAY TAKE SOME PRACTICE TO MASTER.